Stuck in Traffic (From October 2012)

It's hard for me to write this post because I want to make certain that I am writing from love, but because what motivates me is indignation, I know I might easily come off as either whiny and weak or partisan. If either of those conditions are what you get from this post, I will have failed.

I have been home with baby Anna for a couple of months, now, which has given me great time to really get to know her. This downtime has also given me very little time with other adults, so I have depended upon group chats with some of my crazy friends in Tyler, Facetime with my friends, parents, and sister, and--sadly--upon Facebook for everyday interactions. 

Now, full disclosure: I am a progressive (a.k.a. "Liberal Scum"). I was raised by generous, loving Conservative Republicans--my dad owns a struggling small business, and taxes have always been a burden for him--but from a pretty early age, I felt that some people were paying attention to money while others were paying attention to people. Please understand that, though I tend to see the world better from the standpoint of one who focuses on the needs of people, I know this is probably because I was raised with no financial needs--free from money worries, I have been free to focus on people more. There is a good chance that things only work if some people are people-centered while others are money-centered; it likely requires both in the big picture. 

That being said, I am usually okay with the fact that about 50% of people tend to disagree with me, politically (really more than that because I live in East Texas, but I am writing from that big picture I mentioned earlier), and I don't even get bent out of shape about people voicing their points-of-view--I loved the "I disagree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it" quote from my 6th grade Social Studies teacher's bulletin board. However, much of what I see on Facebook these days goes beyond rational people who happen to view the world differently that I do right into the realm of fear-mongering militants spewing hatred. When I run across these sorts of posts, I usually comment, calmly, just to push back a bit, but there are some posts that bring out the worst in me.

Take this gem:

In a way, this is a pretty funny little jab at Obama. At least it is creative. But it is also pretty offensive to people like me, and it was created and posted just to piss us off. It is inaccurate, racist, and religiously hypocritical (Christianity actually calls us to love people who are not "us," like Samaritans, but instead we use our religion of love as a weapon against Muslims), and it picks on Obama in an underhanded way (he is not a Muslim, not that there's anything wrong with it if he were!)

It seems to me that crap like that is not honest--I would be fine with a friend posting her honest fears about a candidate, but the above is actually a statement not meant to open respectful dialogue.

But there is much worse out there! There are people who wish to exploit the honest religious faith of so many Americans by using the schemes and tropes of Christianity, but plugging President Obama into the Apocalyptic framework (that so many of us have suck a small understanding of, already):

This one pisses me off in 3D! It is exploitative and underhanded and it is a lot of what is wrong with Christianity as it is expressed these days.

* * *

What baffles me is that I don't get what so many people have against Obama. I mean, he hasn't been terribly liberal or anything near the "Socialism" that so many people lament. He has been pro-Wall Street during a time when many Americans (and anyone truly Liberal) would have hyper-regulated, since shady, under-regulated practices resulted in a huge recession; he has not declared "war on Christianity," though just listening to pundits would make you think that America, today, doesn't look a thing like America under President Bush. Maybe I am thick, but I see the same country with mostly the same policies and practices as six years back. About all that Obama has accomplished is restoring the US's credit abroad, in both Islamic and non-Islamic countries, and the infamous "Obamacare," which stopped way short of anything truly liberal, and which has not yet take effect--he gave insurance companies tons of time to find sneaky back doors before the better parts take effect. In fact, what is now the Affordable Care Act was originally a Republican plan.... From my vantage, Obama's lack of real Progressive revolution comes closer to having me vote elsewhere than anything that he has done.

Honestly, I don't see whatever it is that makes our President any worse than President Bush was! I mean, think of all of the things we did as a country under Bush that are simply not "American": Warrantless wiretapping. Torture of prisoners. Unilateral attacks on other countries. Unabashed war profiteering. Posturing and attitudes that ostracized the world community. Perhaps it is because of Bush's Koala-bear face, but somehow none of the above seemed to outrage my Facebook community nearly as much as Obama has just by being in office. 

Here's the thing: I might understand people's beef with the President better if they would communicate it! Instead, I get to see ridiculous posts about how Obama has raised fuel prices, even though Presidents can do very little to help gas prices. Or I get veiled references to his race, or to some war against Christianity, though everyone I know gets to worship how they want, when they want, etc. The only credible complaint I have seen is a huge ball of fear because Obama said he, personally, supports Homosexual Marriage, but how that affects my conservative friends I still do not comprehend--if you are against gay marriage, don't get gay married! 

* * *

All of that middle stuff was just positioning myself where you would know my bias, and expressing my befuddlement with the environment of fear I have found, especially on FB. This post is really about communication and love and respect.

It is not the misinformation, itself, that makes me consider deleting my Facebook account about three times each week, nor the fact that people who I care for and respect have opposing views to my own. What puts me in despair is the manner in which people--many of whom I regard very highly in the real world--communicate their views. I know people who say inflammatory things all of the time just to get a response, who then respond to any response they get with comments like, "Isn't it just like a stupid Liberal to get his panties in a wad about something I said! I am an AMERICAN with the FREEDOM TO SPEAK WHATEVER I WANT! You Socialists are always wanting to limit speech!"

So, my acquaintance baits people he disagrees with, and then revels in their replies so he can slap at them again! And he does this sort of thing for fun, all the time! I know quite a few muckrakers who enjoy Facebook "debates," but there is something manipulative about that guy's ways that do nothing to further the exchange of ideas. Does he have the right to post whatever he wants? Hell, yes he does! but does his way communicate friendship or respect for the people he opposes? No. 

As goes Facebook, so goes the world. Facebook merely mirrors the polarized state of our country. Gone is common courtesy, working together for a common goal, and persuading others that your position is correct (persuasion keeps its audience in mind and seeks to appeal to an audience using logic and emotions while maintaining credibility. It can be subtle). What is left is two sides speaking over one another. 

On a podcast I listen to, I heard Social Media compared to heavy traffic. In traffic, people in their own cars forget that they are part of the traffic, that they are in public, and this forgetful state of mind leads to road rage, nose picking in full view of others, and assorted other phenomena. I guess we see a sea of machines all around us and feel dehumanized, and then begin to dehumanize the others we are in context with. But this kind of behavior is based on a misconception that we are in private! As soon as we are in a context that is face-to-face, we become more civilized (few of us would curse out a person in line in front of us at the DMV, but in the traffic to get there, we are likely to say or do anything when frustrated). Facebook is just like that. Trapped in our own minds, responding to disembodied posts, we are liable to say or post anything; In person with someone we are acquainted with, we may still disagree, but most would certainly not become abusive based on the disagreement. It is called decorum, and though most of us exercise it in person, it can be hard to find online.

I do not hide my politics on Facebook and I do not apologize for them anywhere. I feel like I am liberal from a genuine place inside of me. I try to love others without regard to their race or financial position, sexual orientation or politics, and I am friends with many people who I disagree with in important ways. I sometimes WISH that I could change and see the world as the majority of my family and friends see it all, but I am authentic in my folly, so I think that I must be who I am supposed to be. My personal faith ties in with my politics--I truly believe that we are supposed to care for others' needs above our own profit and security, that all people of all creeds and nationalities are children of the same God and are deeply loved by him, and that the riches I have been blessed with are NOT my own, regardless of how hard I work--they come from God and it is wrong to resent sharing with others (even if their culture is different from mine, their employment status is different than mine, or their skin color is different than mine). 

My job is to share my blessings and gifts with the world and people who cheat the systems that are in place (be they Welfare queens or Corporate Lawyers who get Hummers to drive using large tax credits intended to help farmers get new equipment) have their own karma and have to face the Source with their own sins--Like my blessings, I have plenty of sins my own.

So, though I will likely never come to the exact same political position as you, kind reader, I promise you that I will speak on Facebook with respect for you, especially while I am disagreeing with your status update. And I will continue to turn all of my available cheeks rather than responding to you without love. I will not forget that it is good that your position and point of view is not identical to mine, for who knows what the ultimate plan is, and I will continue to hope that, together, we can create a world of respect despite differences, beginning right now, even on Facebook.